The proper way to go about relationships

Hello Loves,

This post has been long overdue, because I got the idea from someone a while ago. I was speaking to a young lady who just got out of a break-up with her boyfriend, it was the lady who suggested that I turn my words into a blog post, and tada here it is.





How to navigate love in a relationship: although heart breaks can sometimes feel inevitable when the person that we are dating does something that hurts us, I believe that we need to know where our true love comes from, our true love comes from God. God loved us before our partner loved us, and God loves us more perfectly than they do. Our partner should never take God’s place in our lives, God is the only one who loves us perfectly, and we therefore need to accord him that respect and the number 1 position, because he deserves it. A common mistake that people make is to focus all their energy on their partner, or to solely expect love from their partner. No! you focus your energy on God and expect his perfect love. You also encourage your partner to seek God for love. The love between you and your partner needs to be informed by God’s love. You should love them the way that God has loved you. You should forgive them when they hurt you, the same way that God has forgiven us over and over. You should be faithful and honest with them, the way that God has been with you. That is real love.

Praying for your relationship: you should always remember to pray for your relationship. When things are going bad, pray and when things are good, still pray. God is our heavenly father who has the power to make a bad situation good, and a good situation even better.

What to do when heart-break occurs: In the instance that your partner breaks your heart, you should talk to God about how you feel in this situation.

Concerning God, Psalm 147:3 says

He heals the brokenhearted
    and binds up their wounds”

God is more than capable to deal with anything that is causing problems in your relationship. God is also able to direct you to a new and better person for you if there is no hope of redemption with the current one.




Experiencing God first: I always say this to single people: it pays to experience God’s love before dating people. Firstly, God would confer a new identity on you and improve your value of self-worth. When you build a solid relationship with God, you would know the deep meaning behind being called a “daughter” or “son” of God. Do you know what it means to be daughter or son of a King who is above all kings, a God who possesses all the knowledge, all the riches, all the glory, all the abundance, all the mercy, all the love, all the power, do you know? And trust me, it runs even deeper. God would not only leave the words “you are a chosen generation, a holy nation etc” on paper, he would prove it to you. When God begins to answer your prayers and take you on a journey with him, you would realize that you are special. This sense of self-worth is beneficial to gain, before dating. Dating can become a cruel ground. There are people who have dated people who made them feel bad about how they look, their size, their underachievements and so much more. When you are self confident going in, you would be bulletproof to these types of situations if it ever happens.

Letting God lead you: Secondly, God would not leave you high and dry. If you ask God to direct you to the right person for you, he will. If you do not know how to hear from God, you should visit my article on How to build a relationship with God

In the article above, there is a section called “hearing from God”, there I wrote some details on how you can hear from God. If you also happen to have a spirit-filled local pastor, you can also ask them for direction on these types of issues. When God directs you to the right person for you, you would not need to worry about not being a fit, because you would be. Even if both of you have arguments, you would know that God directed you to this person, and there must be a reason for that.

Dating a true believer: thirdly, dating a true Christian is a safe option for all believers. Some people believe that their partners would not cheat on them because of the love that their partners have for them. I am here to say that that is a big lie. It is not the love that a person has for you that would stop them from cheating on you, it is their personal principles and convictions that would stop them from cheating. When a person is a true believer, God is the one who convicts them of their wrongdoing. Aside from the physical consequences of doing the wrong thing like i.e. cheating, they also understand the spiritual consequences of such actions. They also would not treat you badly, because God does not entertain such behavior. You can be rest assured that you are in good hands. I would like to point out here that it is not everyone that you see in a church that is a true believer. Does the person obey God’s word? If not, they are not true believers. You need to know this, before getting involved.


2 thoughts on “The proper way to go about relationships

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